Shinocturne

(New week, new entry.)

Not exactly the best second/third week to be having right now. But hey, what's life without its own ups and downs. The exhibition is really getting to me now. Well, not the exhibition per say, just the people involved in it. I don't know what I can do to quell the egomaniac virus going around in the class. Perhaps by thinking that I can do something about that situation makes me an egotistical person as well? Hmm, I wonder.

I don't understand why some people overreact to the smallest possible things and try to make a grand commotion out of it. I suppose there's really nothing I can do about it for now except press forward.

Classes are fine so far, nothing big going on that is sucking the soul right out of inside me yet. We have a music video assignment for Mr. Stone and I don't exactly know what I want to do for that particular assignment yet. I have a feeling I'll be mulling over this until I hit a dead end. The song I struck was Sting - Shape of My Heart, something pretty classic, but I guess there's a deeper meaning to the song behind the lyrics that I need to analyze before going in depth for the video.

Getting tired of putting up a facade for a lot of people around me who are constantly getting on my nerves. It's taking my focus away from the important things such as my assignments. I spend more time reflecting over the negative things rather than spend time thinking about the infinite possibilities. I feel like I've become a black hole over the past few years after the things I've experienced. Lost that ray of sunshine to guide my way back from the dark.

I think that's all for this week. I've made no real progress as a student. Heck, I don't think I've made much progress as a human being either. I'm falling behind. Desperately need to find something to grasp at, and I don't think religion will do me any good. God isn't exactly pulling on the right heart strings at the moment.

it's 12:39 AM now

Sunday, August 15, 2010

(This post is for my assignment, due every Saturday. Since it's more like a self reflective thing, might as well post as an entry. Relevant anyhow.)

First week back on campus everything seems to be moving at a fast pace, unlike the holidays where everything is slow paced and relaxing. First task back on campus is of course to register with the faculty and the usual stuff. I dislike registering on the first day but it seems like things went well and by God's grace I managed to finish the whole registration process in under 4 hours for the very first time since foundation (since you get that whole parental privilege thing if you bring a guardian). Not much classes on the first week back as well, and as such we were all still in the holiday mood.

Well, the biggest worry I have in mind right now is how to fill up my portfolio as it's completely uninteresting and probably not very packed at all, unlike the senior's portfolios that we have seen. Feels like there is a tough burden to keep up with the standards and especially since there is a big expectation on our batch as well.

Second thing on the worry list is the student's graduation exhibition and showcase. I reckon it's a real big mess right now. The hierarchy is set up, and I happen to be one of the leaders for one of the sub-groups, which is the video Team, but it seems some people are unhappy about that. All I can do is to show them what I can do I suppose. Some people love creating drama in our class after all. They love making scenes and getting the attention even though they do not have the skills to compensate for their big talks and loud voices. It's depressing that these people call themselves adults and professionals. But then, can't sink to their level and must maintain the team dynamics for the sake of the greater good and all that crap.

Lastly, something to reflect on my feelings:

I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind
I left my body laying somewhere in the sands of time
I watched the world float to the dark side of the moon
I feel there is nothing I can do...yeah.

-Kryptonite, 3 Doors Down.

Because I am vulnerable and weak right now.

it's 5:34 PM now

Sunday, August 08, 2010

How's Life?

Interestingly enough, pretty dull. Back in college means going through the same everyday mundane routine. That's more or less the deal right now. I wake up, wash up, head off to campus, have breakfast, attend class, go to the faculty, have group meetings, think about assignments, the future, my girlfriend, etc..

It's strangely tiring. But somehow refreshing..odd. Well, I suppose it has something to do with having nothing to do at all during the holidays. That's excluding the KK trip. Speaking of which, pictures to upload; note to self.

I've been overcome with a plague of procrastination and laziness. I want to get this phase of my life over with as fast as I can. Get my degree, and get my own place, and my own job. Pre-mid life crisis anyone? Hrm.

Played a lot of League of Legends (LoL) lately. Don't know why. Getting back into the gaming hype? I'm planning on getting a lot of things. Maybe some of those things I don't really need but yeah. I rarely get anything for myself..so I guess I deserve to go on a shopping spree.

Checklist:
-New Laptop (Alienware anyone? Macbook? Considering my options.)
-New External HDD x2 (My girlfriend and my brother are both asking for it.)
-New Digicam (Birthday/Anniversary/Christmas present 3 in 1 for the lady)
-New DS (Cuz mine's almost past expiration date)

Well that's about it so far. Maybe a new haircut to boot. Or a new attitude. Maybe I'm not 'sassy' enough lol, whatever that means. Anything I want not on that wishlist? Hm, maybe have the girlfriend come over here for vacation/studies would be nice. But I know that's a tall order, for sure. I can always dream, heh.

Sometimes I wish I can pull of a KBNJ and split myself into multiple entities. Never enough time to do good things. Read a book. Hang out with friends. Watch a movie. Blah. Last sem in college. Hopefully everything goes well. No real plans this semester. Maybe everything is spontaneous. Cheers. Signing off.

PS: I find myself obsessing over country music lately. Must have been infected by Christian Kane from Leverage. =/

it's 6:22 AM now